Posted by: Mad Mark Wirtz | December 7, 2007

GETTING OLD

 Let’s see, what’s new? I’m getting old - that’s what! Bummer!
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know - “We’re as young as we feel…” Bullshit! Getting old sucks!

Oh, sure, we may FEEL as young as we feel, but we are every bit as old as we are! ‘Don’t believe me? Check your odometer!

Because, let’s face it - we ARE like cars aren’t we? After a certain mileage, things go wrong, and we are wayyyy out of warranty…! A leak here, a rattle there… starter shot, muffler clogged up and sputtering… a flat every other day…

That’s why I carry some Viagra around with me at all times, just in case, right here in my left pocket in a little blue box. That’s so I don’t confuse them with my laxatives in my right pocket in a little red red box.

He, he… the other night I got ‘em mixed up… Whoooo! Talk about the shit hitting the fan! Mama Mia! I didn’t know if I was coming or going…!

Oh, excuse me, ‘gotta shuffle on. My nurse just arrived to dust me off, get rid off the pesky cobwebs, replace the moth balls, change the batteries, vacuum my brain and stick a safety pin on my scrotum…

Cheers,

M ;)

http://www.markwirtz.com

Responses

Yeah,
You’re crazy. You really say some funny shit though. People don’t say funny shit like this anymore; it’s fucking taboo; oh well, fuck em’.

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